Few days ago I was In pune when my I got mail from my college management regarding collection of convocation certificate i.e proof that this(me) idiot is an engineer. This certificate is very essential for a student since my dear university has already separated degree from job and now education from knowledge. Thus it is a normal phenomenon since last few years that a waiter taking order in a hotel says I am an engineer from Mumbai university! And you got to believe him after seeing his degree certificate! that’s beauty of my university, basically it works as per article 19 of constitution which allow us freedom of taking job as per our wish so Engineer doing job of waiter, clerk, banker and so on… this is normal.
And coming back to original topic, I read the mail which is here,
This mail actually came as a sweet surprise to me since during my last year I worked seriously to convince my HOD for e-governance of college department and it was happening…
So to follow the death line of 30th April I rush to Ratnagiri to collect the certificate, few of my friends who are trainee engineers now asked me to collect their certificate on their recommendation letter. Since a very few students from FAMT have got job in various companies the management was unaware of the fact that trainees don’t get leave during training period… so be it, the Clark told me that each person should come personally to collect his/her own certificate. I said never mind to myself and collected my certificate and signed the log with my contact number. While getting out of office I convey this disgusting rule to my poor trainee friends.
As it was April ending submissions were going on with students sitting outside staff room completing their journals, journals… this is a really painful work for many and a cakewalk for others if done in ‘engineers way’, so just remind me my old days, I entered in staff room where submission were going, mam greeted me and offered a sit, she was busy in taking submission but still she managed chatting with me meanwhile. And when she was a little bit of free from students she asked me for the certificate in my hand n pointed out that on certificate name of college is mentioned as M F academy of management and technology she also said that she has seen more certificate with this name, I was surprised to know that for 4 years I learnt in a college writing FAMT as its name and suddenly on my proof on engineering it appear as M F AMT. a surprise for me!, well anything can happen in India! Just remembered recent corruption case of medical council of India chief ketan desai… anything is possible in my country!
It was again rush at her cabin for submission so I decide to ask other manager that is my department HOD regarding actual name of my college. The HOD of IT is a true geek, if u came in FAMT there are very few great things out there he is one of them. It’s a great feeling to be with such talented person. As per his talent he should be in some IIT but donno why he is in ratnagiri? I have asked him abt it but he always avoided answering this question may be his personal problem.
Anyways Sir clarified me that the M stands for some maritona university from Australia (finolex had join collaboration with some Australian university! Well well, FAMT works under UGC, still in India foreign university bill is in ‘bill’ condition it will be put in front of parliament on 15th of may 2010 for first time. Also FAMT just offer BE and MCA degree course only. so what and why collaboration with maritoba? Besides my doubt was why do u need other university when Mumbai university is enough for all sort of bizarre disasters! But its FAMT, with a hidden meaning of ‘M’ which I will discussed in coming part.
Then I leave sirs cabin with as usual feeling I told sir n+1 ideas for improving conditions in collage with aid of technology, As usual sir listen to all; forgot the n ideas and decide to support the 1 in coming days. So I leave his cabin and again discussed same things with my friends. My friends are really cool they always listen to my all ideas(?) very patiently but they never give their opinions about it. Anyways as it was their lunch time so I leave.
As I came to home and relaxed, I once again read the certificate and wonder for every paper of 8sem I have written name of my college as FAMT so what can be real meaning of FAMT? Truly with all 4 years of experience of college days, one thing was very sure that college is a factory of producing mindless robots but if it is not producing engineering minds then what can be name of my academy? and I came up with following sweet names for my academy.
The First one that came in my mind was Finolex academy of mismanagement and tantrum
This is actually a very realistic title as I have learn how thinks should not be managed so as to have a best performance out of the system… reverse learning. U know in FAMT there is no management course but still through this reverse learning they manage to teach students about management. (see at last they are managing something!!!)
The higher management is so allergic to the management that recently they have declared that IT has no relation with management (I am rolling on floor just while typing this) how stupid one can be, my suggestion… just have a look at new syllabus. It was like a ‘talibanic fatawa’, a backward looking approach. Let it be, god bless them. foreign universities( i.e. American invasion) are coming soon in India. Hope it will open their eyes.
FAMT has a great legacy of mismanagement I don’t remember what it has managed effectively last time. Ohh… how can I forget this they can effectively perish talent of teachers and students; same is true about aspiration and dreams of students.
So the other part tantrum, it is actually result of ego mainly and it is seen in India peoples since years as I am learning Indian history there is 1000s of years of history where this ego has lead to destruction, and the great country we are… the great Indian culture we have like no other country in world has got, I mean we are so great that we have and had mastery in everything peace, philosophy, polity creativity of art, science, music and just like that, we have mastery in self destruction with castism, betrayal, envy, ‘back-ward looking policies’ And this legacy continues today… (a complete balance?). it has became our hobby not to learn from history; I mean how vast is Indian history who will learn it all! better Let’s make mistakes and learn each time, it doesn’t matter if those are made by our ancestors in past. let’s do it in better way with more destruction…
So where all this Indian history came from? ya tantrum… right, in FAMT first the teachers throw tantrum on students during their 4 year tenure and as soon as student finishes his/her BE he throw tantrum on the faculty (wow the student is master in atleast something that has came from the teachers)
It’s not just between student and teacher but between management and teachers too, the teachers are not allowed to show mistakes of management they are not even allowed to feel the feedback forms of various institute with freedom, the HOD and senior professors of various departments openly abuse principle of FAMT the clerk sitting in office does same with students the registrar does same with all… wow what a great legacy of tantrum.
So I have named FAMT as Finolex academy of mismanagement and tantrum
Other name came in my mind was Finolex academy of mismanagement and time wastage This is another perfect name for my academy Infact was thinking about writing a book or starting a blog or page on facebook with title like,
‘101 ways of wasting time effectively’ or
‘101 ways to waste time in engineers way’ or
‘how to waste time efficiently’
Anyways the fact is till 4th sem I attended lectures very seriously tried to listen every word of professor but after that teachers changed and things got worse. when I tried to concentrate it usually resulted in drowsy feeling I used to google on my cell for ‘how to keep eyes open during drowsy lectures’! But then I took guidance of great last benchers, these are one category of people who has so much patience that they can enjoy any lecture be in of engineering or of any other stream; its same thing for them. So these monks of last bench shown me path of salvation, which included literally infinite ways of spending lecture time without getting bored! but I choose only few of them (that’s why book is only about 101)
Cost for our 1 hour was equivalent to 0.125 marks i.e. total ~40 lectures in semester and 1 precious hour waste of youth! That’s how me n my friends used to weight lectures as knowledge gain from such lectures ware 0.001 ( that 0.001 for developing patience!) the most frustrating duration of my life but we were helpless, that’s life… but it improved my maths as for various lectures, teacher and subjects the factor 0.125 kept on changing and this was another good time pass in lectures. A very few lectures were independent of marks which I enjoyed thoroughly.
with addition to this there was the each year’s same mistakes causing delay and time wastage, like submission, queue in front of office for filling form, useless lectures, common offs etc. (I told u it’s our legacy not to learn from history!) common off reminds me one of my great friend who is right now doing job, he is very sad coz his company doesn’t allow him to take common offs.
So in the academy no matter how much time a student may take for completion of his degree it doesn’t even matter if he became BE finally but one thing is sure that he becomes master of wasting time.
And finally I came up with best possible title i.e. Finolex anarchy of management and technology (where finolex stands for just college)
it is said in political science ‘if there is no respect for head of organization in minds of subject, if he cannot understand problems of his subject, if he cannot have any forward looking policy, it is the beginning of anarchy for that state’.
Agitation and unity can break down such state at any instant I know this will not happen with a private body since it’s not a government and it’s not an issue of life and death. These are political concepts and u need to study it to learn seriousness of it. It’s about choosing between freedom and fear. Interested people may contact me for clarification coz I m not in mood to discuss philosophy here today.
‘Anarchy of management’ I have talked about it in brief. About anarchy of technology, in FAMT we still don’t have wi-fi router, the director says don’t use mobile phones not even for educational use, just 4-6 working PC for internet and out of date technical knowledge of current affairs of IT world. That defines technology in FAMT, annual projects are mostly based on outdated technology sometimes a copy-paste from other college too.
I remember one of my friend asked for permission for a website for his department and director asked him why PHP and apache build site in asp. (thank god he didn’t ask him to develop it with punch cards) finally he rejected the idea without giving any reason.
Placement cell don’t have database of students (besides what is its use if companies never visit FAMT) the tech fest of colleges goes faint with annual event utopia. And above all if u write about a latest technology in exam papers and expect to get good credit for it, you surely get f**ked up.
So this all I was thinking and suddenly my mobile rang… it was my friend, I pick the call he said “college has sent all certificate back to university there is an error in name of college so you come and collect letter from college so as to get changed certificate from university which u will have to collect from the university later” I said WTF… what else I can do! (besides now a days I also write this kind of blogs)
So in this way it was another feather in crown of finolex academy of mismanagement. The great academy it is, never miss a change to prove me right!